10 Ways to deal with a disrespectful wife

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Tag : ARTICLES On Wed 4th May 2022

1. Do not take her disrespect personally

Her behavior is hers. It is normal for you to think you are doing something wrong, but avoid feeling offended. Her reaction is hers. Keep that thought in your mind as you shape the conversation you wish to have with her about her disrespect.

2. Pick the time for the dialogue

You certainly don’t want to enter into the discussion in the heat of the moment. In the morning, you might tell her that you’d like to have a heart-to-heart talk later, preparing the groundwork. Invite her out to dinner so that she will be distraction-free.

3. Start with focusing on her, not you

“I can sense some anger. Can you tell me about where that is coming from?” might be a good opening question. Your wife might get pleasantly surprised and react passively instead.

4. Ask her what she needs to feel respect towards you

Again, the focus is on her needs. This sends a message that she is important to you, and you want her to be happy.

Of course, nothing is going to change all of a sudden. But, if you keep practicing this regularly, she might mellow down over a period of time.

5. Ask your wife if she would be open to going to a marriage counselor

You don’t have to force her into it. You two can even opt for couple counseling. This way, you can communicate to her that you value the relationship above everything else and that you too are willing to make changes in your attitude for the greater good of the relationship.

6. Ask her to opely determine the issues

Tell her you are invested in the health of your relationship, and you want to make things work between you. Ask her if she can identify concrete issues that you and she could work on.

7. Be ready to devote several conversations to this process

Your marriage cannot be fixed with one date night or one session with a therapist. You need to have immense patience and appreciate your wife even if she shows little signs of improvement.

8. Try to be more vulnerable to each other

Be ready to hear her truths and even you need to start being vulnerable. Opening up to each other will promote healing. Even this will be a very slow process. And, practice vulnerability only when you feel that the time is right.

9. Ask your wife for clarity when you get confused with what she says

If your wife says things that you don’t understand completely, ask her for clarity. Never assume what she is trying to say.

Assumptions are one of the biggest relationship destroyers!

10. Be ready to move on if she states she is not interested in doing anything differently

This sends a message that you will not tolerate inappropriate disrespectful behavior. You cannot go on and on if nothing that is suggested above works for you.

You must definitely try to save your relationship. But, despite your best efforts, if the relationship continues to be unhealthy, perhaps you need to move on.

Wrapping up

In every relationship, the two people yearn to be seen, heard, and understood. Often a wife’s disrespectful behavior is a hidden cry for attention.

By taking the time to go deeply into the whys behind your wife’s signs of disrespect, there is hope for healing and a new chapter in your relationship.

Also, if you find the reasons behind her disrespectful behavior to be unjustified, don’t let your mental health go for a toss. Seek professional advice to make a decision in the best interest of your health and relationship.