Do you often say to people around you that my wife doesn’t respect me? But why does she disrespect you?

This is an important question to ask, and it is the starting point of being able to identify issues in order to be able to move towards a productive dialogue on why a wife disrespects her husband.

Have an open conversation to unearth the reason

To find out why your wife disrespects, start with a conversation. It will be a difficult conversation and one that needs to be managed with great care. 

It may be beneficial to consult a marriage counselor who has the expertise to guide you and your wife through the process of uncovering the sources of her disrespect. 

When a wife insults her husband, there is a history behind this anger. When a wife undermines her husband, there is something brewing beneath her behavior. 

Working with a marriage counselor can be vital. With a counselor, you and your wife have

a safe space to reveal your emotions and reactions. The counselor will help keep the conversation on track.

Get to the root of the problems to understand the reason

“My wife is rude and disrespectful,” one husband revealed during a marriage therapy session. “Can we explore what is provoking this behavior?” 

The wife, in turn, revealed that she felt very alone in the marriage, almost invisible. Their relationship over the years had devolved into more of an exchange than a loving, supportive partnership. 

The early days were filled with romance, good talks, time is taken to be together emotionally and physically. 

But as the years went on, the wife felt less and less important. Her reaction was to turn into an arrogant wife, one that showed her disdain for her spouse with signs of disrespect in marriage. 

Because the husband felt his wife treated him like crap, he reacted by not engaging with her. He felt that if he did not engage, he could not be the victim of her disrespect. He no longer wanted to deal with a stubborn wife. So he checked out. 

A vicious cycle was created: he avoided interacting with her, she felt ignored, she degrades her husband to spark a reaction (and feel “seen”), he wonders, “why is my wife so mean?”

Apart from these two tips to decipher the reason behind why your wife is being disrespectful towards you, here are a few common reasons why wives disrespect their spouses.

• If a spouse is disrespectful, their wife ought to be disrespectful towards them!
• A wife disrespects a husband when she is no longer interested in the marriage.
• When a wife is having an extra-marital affair, she inadvertently disrespects her spouse.
• When a wife has some underlying issues which she is unable to express freely, it often comes out as disrespect towards the spouse
• When a wife has a better career or earns more money, she tends to disrespect the spouse.

These are some of the many reasons for lack of respect in a marriage. Use these tips to find out what reason holds true in your relationship.

You may also seek a counselor’s help to navigate you through this perplexing situation.